I probably won’t be doing much writing over the weekend. In fact I won’t be doing much of anything except dancing frenetically in weirdly-lit hellish cellars because I am about to enter into a ninety-six hour gigtastic bender. As we young(ish) people say. So as a favour to the rest of the Lib Dem blogosphere I will be turning my blog into a toilet for the duration.

Are YOU prone to bleating, whining, wetting yourself, throwing all your toys out of the pram and beating your little fists against your keyboard? Do YOU regularly call for the contest to concentrate on policy issues while writing yet another post that doesn’t?

Do YOU find yourself regularly using words like ”smear” and “spin”, and have you at any point over the last five weeks shaken your head gravely and with barely concealed glee muttered “Well, his supporters aren’t doing him any favours at all, that’s all I’m saying.”

Can’t watch a clip of Nick Clegg, a polylingual Cambridge graduate, without making mean-spirited, shirty remarks about lack of substance? Can’t listen to Chris Huhne give a less than glowing opinion of his opponent without concluding that he is the antichrist? Can’t read a post by a supporter of the opposite camp without running off to write your own about how meeeeean all the opposite supporters are?

This toilet blog post is for YOU and your pointless brainwaste! Get it all out of your system in a safe environment! Get your arse off Lib Dem Voice so that the rest of us can have a conversation, and use this blog instead! Do us and the candidates a favour!

Here comes the comments section. The filters are off, and there ain’t no troll policy. You know who you are and you know what to do…